Sunday, October 24, 2010

Sunday Funnies



More Broadside here.

22 comments:

SCOTTtheBADGER said...

I thought heart removal was done just before becoming an XO.

ewok40k said...

I wonder what they do to the ADM?

sobersubmrnr said...

Vasectomy.

sobersubmrnr said...

Vasectomy.

sobersubmrnr said...

Vasectomy.

LT B said...

Issue knee pads

Retired Now said...

I guess the smartest Officers would be satisfied to wear "railroad tracks" on their collars.

Grandpa Bluewater said...

Scott the B: The actual process is a little more complicated. The one constant in every case an XO sees is the sad story that touches the heart. The result is the rapid growth of callus until an XO's heart is like a ditch digger's hands  in 1795.  Mostly callus.

Andy said...

Reminds me of the following sayings:
"Ensigns have classmates; Lieutenants have shipmates and squadronmates; Commanders have peers and Captains have rivals."

"Ensigns sit around bitching they have no time or money to go out and have fun.  LT's go out and have a LOT of fun. CDR's sit around and worry about just how much fun the LT's are having. CAPT's sit around and tell each other stories about how much they had as LT's."

ewok40k said...

you mean rather castration?
ouch!

C-dore 14 said...

"Old fudds, young studs, and Lieutenant Commanders"

ewok40k said...

and ADMs have underlings!

William Powell said...

Whew! Guess I retired just in time.   (retired LT)

LT Rusty said...

Looks like I got out just in time, then!

The Usual Suspect said...

Issue knee pads and remove gag reflex.  A simple procedure that can be peformed at the same time with a local, since a spinal block is all but impossible with the previous spine removal.

ShawnP said...

Can the same be said about E-7, E-8 and E-9?

Grumpy Old Ham said...

Geez, I guess that explains why I didn't make O-5...I couldn't get my lobotomy scheduled in time since I was newly arrived on base before the board...

Grumpy Old Ham said...

<span>Geez, I guess that explains why I didn't make O-5...I couldn't get my lobotomy scheduled in time prior to the board since I was newly arrived on base...</span>

Grandpa Bluewater said...

Many Admirals never saw anyone but a rival since they were Midshipmites. Nothing new. The proverb in the Phoenician fleet was doubtless: "The cream and the bastards rise."

 See also Rod Stieger in Dr Zhivago and Fletcher's fitrep on Spruance right after Midway (doesn't rate a 4.0 in Leadership or Force (hrmph!))

http://www.navalhistory.org/2010/06/18/adm-spruances-fitrep-after-the-battle-of-midway/

sobersubmrnr said...

Yeah. Castration. My brain was in vapor lock at the time and I couldn't remember the word, so I went with the next best thing.

The ones running the Navy now are definitely lacking in testicular diameter.

xformed said...

Then they make them COs...when they have "aged."

Grandpa Bluewater said...

Indeed. Reached the peak of maturity and seasoning, like a superb steak. Plenty of salt and on the grill. 

The true hidden bennie of command is you get to say all the good words, shake the hands, praise the honest, humble, hardworking sailors in front of their families, and hand out the medals and commendations.  Mean while the old sheep dog of an XO runs and barks and herds the flock of their lambs away from misadventure. At the ship's party the sailors the XO knows best, can't go (pesky restricted muster).

The worst hazard for CO's is the blindness induced by the growth of stars in the eyes. "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times..." That was from a tale of two ships in the nest, right? ;)