Thursday, January 08, 2009

Private Mary Jane Rottencrotch, USMC

Awwww man - no one ever tells me nut'n. We have come a long way from BAMs.
While doomsayers bemoan America's ongoing wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, researchers at the University of California at San Francisco Medical Center may have turned up a brilliant silver lining.

Thanks to desperate recruiting methods required to staff those wars, the U.S. Marines may be turning military service into a male sexual fantasy land, where recruits are paid actual money to cohabitate with drunk, stoned, horny teenage girls.
The Marines seemed to find their most sexually adventurous female recruits in rural areas, where a disproportionate number of them whiled away their high school years having drunken, stoned, unprotected sex, according to the UCSF report.
This is either a conspiracy by the USMC recruiters or ...
UCSF scientists tested and surveyed 2,157 female U.S. Marine recruits -- out of 2,288 possible respondents -- with an average age of 19. Researchers found that the young women were more than twice as likely as non-military young women to be infected with venereal diseases. And the recruits were prone to engage in behaviors likely to get them sick again.

The sexually-precocious female recruits "perceived that sex is more likely and enjoyable under the influence of alcohol, and were heavy alcohol and drug users before recruit training entry," according to a November 2008 UCSF study titled "Relationships among Sociodemographic Markers, Behavioral Risk, and sexually transmitted infections in U.S. Female Marine Corps Recruits."
"Young women enter recruit training for the military with high levels of STIs [sexually transmitted infections] and increased risk for acquisition of STIs including sex under the influence of alcohol or drugs, sex with a risky partner, and infrequent condom use,"
... condom manufacturers.

I always thought the smart money was with the USAF Upper-Midwest Valkyries they seem to recruit by the dozen - maybe not.

Hey it isn't that bad, it only hurts when you pee during PT - it is better than the other options, I guess.

Hat tip OPFOR.

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